Being stonewalled

So I'm afraid that my update isn't exactly happy news. Basically, I'm getting a lot of respite care placements but when I talk to Merryweather, I get a very strange feeling that she will never willingly use me as a full time home.

This could be for multiple reasons- she already doesn't really like that I'm young, single, and don't have adoption in mind. She loves me for respite care but already made the statement (on accident) that I "won't be getting any kids" at least for the next few months.

To top off that feeling, I had another foster mom tell me she got a call this week for a placement of a 2 year old girl and when they had to turn it down, thought that the next person on the list would be me. Yeah no. Didn't happen. Because she is in my county but gets a different person to work with, she said next time she'll mention my name to see if this other RD worker even knows I exist.

So I'm feeling discouraged but at the same time open minded. This vibe I get could be all for nothing. Merryweather is very spacey so it could just be that I'm not the name that pops into her head when she has a placement or it could be that there hasn't been children that she feels would be a good fit for me yet.

On the upside- I'm doing respite care for three kids this weekend. A 5 month old, 5 year old, and 7 year old. I'm terrified.

Boys are wonderful... and most definitely not for me!

Me, on Saturday night

My 24 hour respite care placement was exciting. And fun. And tiring. And 1000% convinced me that I was on the mark to know that I can only do girls in my home. I simply don't have the space or the energy levels to keep up with boys. I would take girl drama over boy energy any day.

But all the kids were good kids so it was still a fun experience. I ended up dropping off the kids on Saturday night and then rushing to a last minute required CPR/First Aid class of which I was the only person there so I got an abbreviated version. Because I had done the training so many times over the years they basically asked me all the review questions, I showed them my CPR technique on the adult and baby mannequins, and then we all sat around chatting as the couple doing the training happened to be the same ones who did my home study.

 Also, my original RD worker who I did my IMPACT training with was there at the beginning and we chatted for a few minutes. This is the woman who I was DYING to have as my official RD worker but she was in a different county so couldn't take me :(  Anyway, she remembered me, we chatted for awhile, and the couple who did my home study told her that she HAD to find me kids because I was so great (!) and she said that we would read through my study and "keep her eye out" for a placement. That was encouraging since more than a few people told me that if Flora (her blog name) was on my side then I was golden.

So all in all, a good weekend of progress.

I also had my local Foster Parent Association meeting on Thursday night. It was so awesome to just hang out and talk with other FP's and get their take. I'm the newbie so everyone just laughs at my enthusiasm and naivete but not in a mean way and I totally understand their reaction. I'm just enjoying this time of being able to be optimistic about this life. I know that all too soon my optimism will be replaced with disillusion and frustration. ;)

More Respite Care

I got a call asking if I would do another respite care gig this weekend for three siblings. A girl and two boys. Ages 11, 4, and 3. Gulp.

Of course I said yes. My home isn't open for boys for any long term placement but a weekend I can handle. Hopefully they like Barbies and dollhouses because that is all my house currently offers in the way of toys ;)

I'm already thinking their blog names should be from the characters of Brave. They sound like their personalities would fit from the little I got out of their social worker.

I'm starting to worry that I won't ever get an actual placement since they might want to have me just do respite care. Goodness knows there aren't enough homes that are willing (or able) to do such temporary care but I admit, I don't want to just to that. Not sure how I need to handle this. It might just be having an honest conversation with my worker or just saying "no" to the next request.

Respite Care: Day 1

I'm going to start using fake names on this blog. The first fake name you get is of the super cool and really nice social worker who worked out this respite care gig. The name of said person will now be John Smith on this blog.

John Smith comes to the door to make sure its the correct house and then brings kids inside, I say hi and confirm names. He gives me their foster mom's cell phone and leaves. Cue two girls and me staring at each other.

Side note: the girls names on this blog shall now be Elsa (age 11) and Anna (age 10). And yes, all of the names I choose will be Disney names, so their names are taken in honor of the up coming movie Frozen. I'm a total Disney nerd. Sue me.

The girls made it very easy for me. Elsa is quieter and more watchful, Anna is outgoing, talkative and curious. They picked out a room to stay in and then I gave them a quick tour. I found out they both had medications they have to take which made me a bit wary since I wasn't told about this and they pound into you during training that you have to get permission to use anything (tylenol, peptobismol, etc.) so that threw me for a loop.

Then I had to ask them what they could eat after learning they are supposed to eat gluten free. And I'm a vegetarian. Basically most of what I had to offer wasn't going to fly. So we packed up and headed to the grocery store to get food. They were very good but incredibly talkative and in the space of 45 minutes I learned the names of crushes, friends, insights about their school, what they love to do and a bunch of other random stuff.

At one point Anna out of no where says "There is this boy that lives by me and I have a crush on him"

Not quite sure how to respond I asked why she had a crush on him and to that she said because he was cute. Then I said "Cute is good but is he kind? Because cuteness won't matter when they open their mouth"

To this both girls cracked up with laughter and we changed the subject. Ahhhhhh the importance of things when you're a tween. Its a good age to be.