'Tis So Sweet...

’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,

Just to take Him at His word;

Just to rest upon His promise;

Just to know, Thus saith the Lord.

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him,

How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er,

Jesus, Jesus, Precious Jesus!

O for grace to trust Him more.

O how sweet to trust in Jesus,

Just to trust His cleansing blood;

Just in simple faith to plunge me,

’Neath the healing, cleansing flood.

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus,

Just from sin and self to cease;

Just from Jesus simply taking

Life, and rest, and joy, and peace.

I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee,

Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;

And I know that Thou art with me

Wilt be with me to the end.

One of my favorite times is when right before I tuck A in for the night, we study her Awana verses. We sit on the bed together and work on learning one verse each time from her T&T book. I tell her where to find it and she looks it up in her Bible and reads it from there. We talk about what that verse means and do little memory games to help her learn it. She is amazing at memorization so the whole process is maybe 10 minutes long but it is a very sweet, quiet moment that I love.

"I could never be a foster parent"

The number one phrase people use when finding out I'm a foster parent. Its like they immediately feel guilty for not taking in kids so need to tell me why they couldn't. I'm not entirely sure why this reaction is so common. So here are a few suggestions to hand out to folks when that phrase strikes.... because my motto is to get them when they are weak ;)

Just kidding.

Sort of.

1. Donate items to your local foster parent association group. Clothes, books, toys, baby supplies, games, school supplies, and sports equipment are all expensive items when you are starting from scratch. Most foster parents keep a stash on hand of these items for all their approved ages but most will still jump at the chance to fill in the holes.

2. Create intake baskets. These will be given to kids the night they are taken away from their homes. Sheriff offices, DFCS offices, and the foster home could all use them. They are filled with practical items like a toothbrush, a comb, a blanket, stuffed animal, socks, and a snack/juice box. These are all comfort items for the kids, they seem so simple but can make a huge difference in that first night/day. 

3. Be a backup babysitter. This isn't as simple as it seems- it takes work! You need to be fingerprinted and background checked with DFCS. Finding friends who are willing to make the effort to get that done is HARD! Don't wait for the foster parent to ask you.... go find them and tell them you want to be their backup when you can. Eternal gratitude is your's my friend.

4. Be part of our community. Being a foster parent is a lot like entering a very isolated club, there are so many rules and the lifestyle is different from a "normal" family dynamic that many times you feel like you're in this on your own. The more people who make the effort to get involved in our kids lives, support us as parents, even stay in touch with the details of the case (as much as the laws will allow us to share anyway) are all ways to help bridge the gap and keep foster families surrounded by a community of support. That alone makes a huge difference.

5. Be patient with us. Did you know that none of our kids can have sleepovers unless it is at another foster parent's house? That we can have anywhere from 1-3 appointments per week (per child!) that DFCS requires? That we have a handbook 2 inches thick of rules and regulations concerning our kids? That we sit in a hallway at juvenile court for 6 hours without ever actually going in and have to keep the kids quiet in chairs the whole time? That before our kids get haircuts we have to get the parents permission through our case worker? That we have to get permission to go on any trips with at least 2 weeks advance notice? That case workers can call that day and say they need to come inspect our house but then show up an hour late and we can't do anything about that? None of these things are me complaining about the system- they are just a fact of life in a foster home but we need our community to understand that life with us takes patience and understanding. 

Here is my fail for the week: someone donated two bikes for the girls to have. They have been sitting at my church since Tuesday morning but have we found a way to get there yet? No. First up I have to borrow a bigger vehicle to get them and then this week every single night we've had plans. It's looking like it will be Saturday night before we can get over there.

The Least of These

I follow the Fostering Hope Project blog. I don't think there is single entry that doesn't remind me of why I chose to be on this journey. But this one especially spoke to my heart. I can't even say how much I am praying that my church will catch the heart for foster kids in the years to come and be a light in kids live and the community through supporting this ministry.

Read the original post here and check out the other ones also!

THE MEETING HAS BEEN MOVED TO THE SECOND FLOOR.   

The handwritten sign was taped to the wall.
Voices echoed from the conference room, then laughter and crying.  Curious, I peered through the glass door, wondering what occasion had displaced my schedule.  The big conference table that normally occupied the center of the room had been scooted over against the wall.  A few kids were sitting by it, coloring.  Others were running around the room, kicking a ball.  A couple were sitting on the floor, crying giant crocodile tears.  I stepped closer.  Air mattresses and cots lined the wall.  What in the world was going on?  This looked more like a slumber party than a board room.  Or perhaps a shelter, like the kind you see on TV when there has been a hurricane. 

A shelter.  For kids who have no where else to stay.  For kids in foster care.  “There are no open foster homes, and all the actual shelter buildings are full.  This is the shelter overflow,” I was told.  My mind jumped to another story of a child with nowhere to stay.
“She gave birth to her first child, a son.  She wrapped him snugly in strips of cloth, and laid him in a manger, because there was no lodging available for them.”  Luke 2:7 (NLT) 

At least in that story there was a mom and a dad.  In this one, there were only children, supervised in a conference room turned bedroom by a few case workers turned caregivers.  I wondered who these kids had the potential to be.  Teachers?  Athletes?  Doctors?  Maybe, but the reality is that they have no resources.  No source of comfort or encouragement.  A better chance of being a prostitute or a prisoner than anything else.  At least prostitutes and prisoners have a bed. 

I wonder why, in a country of thousands of churches, of millions of homes with a spare bedroom and an extra car seat, why foster kids sleep on an air mattress in a county office.  Why people who label themselves as Christians don’t see the face of Christ himself  in the laughter and the tears of these children.  Who will YOU see?  And what will YOU do about it? 

“For I was hungry, and you fed me.  I was thirsty and you gave me a drink.  I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home.”  Matthew 25:35 (NLT)

A Foster Parent's Bucket List

I Must Be Trippin' recently wrote a post about her personal "foster parent bucket list".

This is one of my favorite foster blogs as the author is very honest and isn't afraid to share the nitty gritty. But balances that with lots of encouragement and cheerleading for the unusual life that is foster parenting.

So go read the whole thing HERE

A few of my favorite excerpts:

"Clothing/supply swap for foster families - Over the past five years of fostering primarily infants, I have accumulated more baby gear, clothing, and other odds and ends than I know what to do with!  Now that I'm leaning more towards fostering PreK-1st grade next, I need to trade in the baby things for older child supplies and toys.  Wouldn't it be great to have a weekend where foster families could get together in one place and swap clothing, gear, toys, etc?"

Can we get real here? Being a young, single first time foster parent- the expenses leading up to this new phase HAS to be budgeted for and if you hear "well, people only foster parent for the money" you know they have never actually met a foster parent. You think $300 a month is going to cover food, clothes, school supplies/activities, baby items and possibly a *gasp* babysitter once a month? Hahahaha. Not to mention all the expenses leading up to opening your home- I had to buy a crib, multiple car seats, clothing for ages 0-10, baby gear, and books. I haven't bought a single toy yet. That is hundreds of dollars. Not to mention the little costs that happen during training (physical, drug test, sewer check, etc.)

I don't regret or wish back a penny I have spent but in the back of my mind I can't help but wish for a community that we could mutually help each other with some of these things.

"Establish a foster/adopt ministry at my church - I know this would be a huge undertaking, but I truly believe that we as a church can do more.  Not everyone is called to foster or adopt, but I do believe that every person has the ability to help a hurting child and the families who have opened their hearts and their homes to the children who need them.  We can do more, and I think it just takes one person to step up and call others to action."

I love this. I want to be the start of a forward movement of being involved in the foster community locally. Whether that means more foster families from my church or just being a support system for case workers and foster families- I think we can do it. I'm hoping to be the spark to get this in the hearts of my church family.

"Join some foster parent organizations - I can't believe I've been a foster parent for nearly five years, and still haven't joined a foster parent association or any other organization geared towards fostering families!  It's a great way to network and meet other families."


I'm an organizer (seriously, my bookshelf of 300+ books is alphabetized) so this is a "Must try!" in my mind. I've looked and searched and scoured all resources to find a local foster parent support group. It doesn't exist. I would love to begin it. Pipe dream quite possibly but I would love to see this in my community.
Anyway. Go check out the rest of items on her list. It really is an awesome testament to the fact that your world expands with foster parenting in all the best ways.

To love is to be vulnerable

Encouragement for the day

This image was borrowed from the Facebook page for Preschoolers are Awesome. If you have this age in your home- join the group! Its filled with friendly people and good ideas for crafts, books, quotes, etc.